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Stardust
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addictions

Post by Stardust on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:24

(originally posted on 14 Jan 2008)

This is consecutive to Candlelight's suggestion in the healing book topic.
I have a friend, or rather friend of a friend, has tried several times to get 'clean' but always returns to old ways with smoking, alcohol and drugs. Perhaps he is not considered deserving of healing, but he has dragged his family into this private hell with him and all are suffering because of this. Could positive and healing thoughts help in this situation ? They are at their wits end and in despair what to do. Has anybody else experienced this and could give advice please ?


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Candlelight.kk
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Re: addictions

Post by Candlelight.kk on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:26

Stardust wrote:This is consecutive to Candlelight's suggestion in the healing book topic.
I have a friend, or rather friend of a friend, has tried several times to get 'clean' but always returns to old ways with smoking, alcohol and drugs. Perhaps he is not considered deserving of healing, but he has dragged his family into this private hell with him and all are suffering because of this. Could positive and healing thoughts help in this situation ? They are at their wits end and in despair what to do. Has anybody else experienced this and could give advice please ?

No-one - but no-one would ever be considered "undeserving" of healing. Healing's not required for physical ailments alone.  Positive healing thoughts would be extremely beneficial for your friend - and also for his family and friends who suffering too.  It must be so difficult for them to keep positive in such a situation, but at the same time so important to keep a positive perspective.  Healing (in fact - anything) works better on positive thoughts.
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Re: addictions

Post by Stardust on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:30

Thank you for your understanding and advice, Candlelight. We're all trying, but we're talking years here already and it's taking its toll, it gets very hard for them to stay positive especially as others in his very close family have problems of their own (breast cancer, glaucoma, Alzheimer's) and he's wearing them down. They do whatever is possible to help him but all attempts have so far failed. Even when he gets an entry into a clinic he either leaves before he's completed treatment or slides back into his old ways as soon as he's out. Every time they have hope only for it to be dashed again and again until they're so desperate my heart bleeds for them all and for him. I will keep sending positive thoughts but it doesn't seem to be doing any good. Why does he see only the dark side of the world and not the light ?


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Re: addictions

Post by Candlelight.kk on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:31

It does seem unfair that some people seem to have more than their fair share of trials and troubles, doesn't it. I certainly seem to have had more than my fair share in life, but I do believe though that every experience, no matter how bad, only serves to make us stronger in the end. When I look back now at some of my situations, I can see now having come out the other end just what I have learned from them. Everything was for a reason, although I couldn't see that at the time. We all learn from our experiences and from the experiences of others, as they do from ours, all part of the "tests" we are given to further our spiritual journeys. That's how I see it anyway.
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Re: addictions

Post by Stardust on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:33

Yes, I think you are right, they are wise words. But it pains me to see them so downhearted and not be able to help somehow.


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Re: addictions

Post by Candlelight.kk on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:34

How is everyone bearing up in this situation?
Still thinking about you all and sending positive vibes.
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Re: addictions

Post by Feather on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:35

This situation is so familiar to me. I tried everything but failed every time.
One thing I do know is that the desire to change must come from the addict
and must be stronger than his harmful urges. I was told many times by
doctors that there was little I could achieve until rock bottom had been reached.
Only when the addict's life becomes worse on drugs etc than without them will
he/she get the jolt needed to bring about a change. The sad thing is that by then the brain
has been so badly damaged that rational thought is impossible.It starts as a physical
addiction but develops into a psychological dependancy as well. We can stay as positive
as we like but the addict inhabits a different world from us.I divorced Morris to try to
bring him to his senses but even that failed.I wish I didn't have to be so negative, sammi,
but these are the sad facts. It will do no harm to send positive thoughts but I truly doubt
if they will do any good either.I wish so much that it was otherwise.


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Stardust
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Re: addictions

Post by Stardust on Fri 05 May 2017, 14:37

Candlelight wrote:How is everyone bearing up in this situation?  Still thinking about you all and sending positive vibes.
Not good, Candlelight, but thank you for your concern and continued thoughts. It goes up and down, you know. Theoretically he wants to stop but in practice his good resolutions never last long and because he continues to see friends in the same situation he just slides back again and again. He wants out but it's so difficult for him faced with temptation all the time, and he can get quite aggressive when anyone tries to advise or help, while on the other hand wheedling and pretending to change when all he wants is more money to go out and buy whatever fix he needs. It's very sad for all concerned. Nobody but himself can take that first step, but the years are passing and time just settles him more in his ways and makes it harder for him to get out.
I can see that Feather also knows all about this, although in that particular case the demon was alcohol.


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