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Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

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Candlelight.kk
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Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Candlelight.kk on 10th April 2018, 20:43

From Funeralzone - "the UK's online funeral resource":
If you are visiting this page because someone close to you has died, we are sorry for your loss. We hope this guide will inform and help you in arranging a funeral and many of the things you may have to think about at this time.

This page tells you about many of the practical tasks, services and goods to consider when you are arranging a funeral.
Arranging a funeral - a step-by-step guide

Arranging a Funeral: A step-by-step guide:


  • Repatriation of a Loved One for a Funeral Abroad
    How to arrange a funeral for your loved one outside the UK

  • The Cost of a Funeral
    Information on the costs involved in arranging a funeral

  • Financial Help with Funeral Costs
    Information on what financial help is available for your loved one’s funeral


  • Funeral Glossary of Terms
    A list of commonly-used terms and definitions you may hear after somebody has died

  • Religious Funerals
    A series of guides about different types of religious funerals

  • Funeral Guides
    Find out more about the types of funeral available, funeral planning and etiquette

  • Planning the Service
    Help & advice on planning the funeral service

  • What is a Pauper’s Funeral? Public Health Funerals Explained
    How and why councils arrange public health funerals for some people when they die

  • Could a Benevolent Fund Help You Through Bereavement?
    Benevolent societies provide hardship funds to help people facing difficult times




Some other helpful advice to be found on the Funeralzone website:

Coping with Bereavement
Practical information and advice on coping with the loss of a loved one


- 10 Practical Ways To Cope With Grief  
- 10 ways that will help you cope with your grief and help you heal after losing someone you love  

  • Coping with the Loss of a Spouse or Partner
  • Advice on grieving after the loss of a husband, wife or partner
       Coping with the Loss of a Parent    
  • Help and advice on how to deal with the grief of losing a parent
       Coping with the Loss of a Grandparent    
  • Advice on learning to cope with grief after losing a grandmother or grandfather
       Coping with the Loss of a Brother or Sister    
  • Learn more about dealing with the loss of a sibling with helpful practical advice
       Coping with the Loss of a Child    
  • Practical suggestions to help you grieve and find ways to heal after the loss of a child
       Coping with the Loss of a Patient    
  • Advice on dealing with grief after losing a patient for hospital staff and carers
       Coping with the Loss of a Best Friend    
  • Advice on learning to heal after the loss of a best friend
       Coping with Bereavement From Suicide    
  • Information on dealing with the death of a loved one through suicide
       Coping with Grief After Miscarriage    
  • Information on grieving for a child after a miscarriage and where to seek support
       Coping with Grief After Stillbirth    
  • Help and support for parents who are grieving the loss of a baby who was stillborn
       Coping with Hurtful Words and Attitudes During Grief    
  • Advice on dealing with difficult people and hurtful comments during grief
       Coping with Feelings of Relief During Bereavement    
  • Dealing with difficult emotions after the death of a loved one
       What is Anticipatory Grief?    
  • Information on pre-bereavement and dealing with grief
       A Guide to Grief Therapy and Bereavement Counselling    
  • How grief counselling and therapy works, plus an overview of different types of therapy





More articles from Funeralzone
   

  • Arranging a Funeral    
  • A Guide to Funeral Etiquette    
  • How to Write a Eulogy    
  • 10 Practical Ways To Cope With Grief    
  • A Guide To Woodland Burials & Green Funerals    
  • A Guide to being a Pallbearer    
  • Poems About Death    
  • Hymns For Funerals
  • Funeral Costs    
  • Letters of Administration


Help & Resources Categories
   

  • When Someone Dies   
  • Arranging a Funeral   
  • Managing Your Estate   
  • Government Services   
  • Funeral Zone Services   
  • Bereavement Support


more  HERE
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Candlelight.kk
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Spiritualist Funerals

Post by Candlelight.kk on 10th April 2018, 20:45

From the same website: Funeralzone

Spiritualist Funerals
Information on Spiritualist funeral traditions and etiquette

People hold many different kinds of beliefs within Spiritualism, but one of its key philosophies is that our bodies are a vessel for our spirit or soul, which lives on when we physically die.
There are around 340 Spiritualist churches and centres around the UK. They are supported by the Spiritualists’ National Union (SNU), which was established in 1901 and now has a charitable status, with around 2,700 Spiritualists paying an annual fee for formal membership.

What is Spiritualism?

The SNU describes itself as a registered religious body for Spiritualism, a movement which began in the mid-1800s. Sherlock Holmes author Sir Arthur Conan-Doyle was famous for his interest in Spiritualism.
The Spiritualist church has seven principles, including a belief in God, the brotherhood of mankind and the eternal-living soul. It has a focus upon studying the journey made by soul, or spirit, when people die.
Among its practices is mediumship, which according to its belief system seeks to connect and “provide evidence of the existence of the Spirit within us all and the continuation of every individual soul beyond physical death.”
Mediums are appointed as ministers, after training in their mediumship through the Spiritualist church’s education system (the organisation has a dedicated college, The Arthur Findlay College, in the Essex).
Spiritualist ministers can offer support to people at the end of their lives and their families in the role of hospital chaplains.
They also provide ceremonies including weddings and Spiritualist funerals.
A good funeral director should be able to liaise with your loved one’s Spiritualist minister or arrange with a local Spiritualist church or centre to hold a Spiritualist funeral.

Spiritualist beliefs

According to Spiritualist beliefs, a Spiritualist funeral is about celebrating the life that the person lived in this world. It’s also about helping bereaved friends and loved ones to share their memories about the person who has died and to look back on their life with joy, as well as express their sadness.

A Spiritualist funeral

A Spiritualist funeral ceremony can include a burial or cremation and a Spiritualist church minister can also officiate at the scattering of a loved one’s ashes or their memorial service.
At a Spiritualist funeral, mourners are reminded that the person who has died has merely left their body – a mortal garment that has served its purpose’ – and their life continues in another sphere beyond the earthly realm.
The focus is upon giving a personalised funeral that says a lot about the person who has died. At many Spiritualist funerals, mourners make personal tributes, share meaningful readings or poems and choose funeral flowers and music that is fitting and special.
The Spiritualist church’s funeral services do not include formal religious language. For this reason, it suggests that its funeral services may be attractive for people who did not regularly attend a place of worship, but would have liked a spiritual element to their final send off.
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by mac on 11th April 2018, 08:28

interesting and helpful
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Misty
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Misty on 12th April 2018, 14:38

I like this bit


The Spiritualist church’s funeral services do not include formal religious language. For this reason, it suggests that its funeral services may be attractive for people who did not regularly attend a place of worship, but would have liked a spiritual element to their final send off.

I like the idea of a Spiritualist church funeral service and a woodland burial in a forest perhaps.

Anyone here ever attended a woodland burial?
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by mac on 12th April 2018, 15:02

Misty wrote:I like this bit

The Spiritualist church’s funeral services do not include formal religious language. For this reason, it suggests that its funeral services may be attractive for people who did not regularly attend a place of worship, but would have liked a spiritual element to their final send off.

I like the idea of a Spiritualist church funeral service and a woodland burial in a forest perhaps.

Anyone here ever attended a woodland burial?

It's a nice notion but I have no idea if it's straightforward to bury someone in a public wood - I doubt it. 

On another tack, I was making a new will recently and discussing with the solicitor my wishes for disposal and how to word an appropriate document.  I'm offering the whole of my body for whatever scientific purpose it can be used but it may not be wanted anyway. (I'm not that keen on it myself but it's all I've got!)

There will be at least something of me left and needing cremation and I said I'd like the least expensive casket, say cardboard or wicker for economy.  The solicitor told me, though, that might not actually be the cheapest way and that it would be better to leave it to whoever deals with disposal to choose the least expensive way.

I was somewhat surprised but followed her advice when drawing up my wishes document.
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Candlelight.kk
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Candlelight.kk on 12th April 2018, 17:25

Woodland burial is a nice notion, but it's not just a case of picking a spot wherever you wish.  You need to do your proper research first.  There are some fixed 'woodland burial' places around, but some of them are commercially owned areas and can end up costing a lot!
Here is a helpful site, detailing something of what is available around the UK:

http://woodlandburialtrust.com/content/woodland_burial_places.php

Some sites are large commercial enterprises, others are non-profit making charities or local authorities. You will find some sites that are not really woodlands at all, but rough areas added onto existing cemeteries, whilst others offer a much more natural setting. The important thing is that you are able to choose what is right for you and your family.

It is always a good idea to check if a site is registered with The Association of Natural Burial Grounds which is organised by a charity called the Natural Death Centre.

It is also important to ensure that any Woodland Site that you choose is properly certified, so ask to see their certificate.

(I worked for a number of years in the probate department of a legal firm - and saw quite a few requests/wishes for such - where unfortunately the trusted executors of the Will had since passed on themselves and it was left up to the appointed solicitor to see that those wishes were carried out appropriately.  Most were not actually legally binding and usually came under a 'Letter of Wishes' to accompany the Will - and as such a low-down priority when it came to dealing with distribution of the estate.

Everyone who knows me - knows that it is my wish to have my body cremated (doesn't really matter where - whichever is easiest and most convenient for those left behind), and for my ashes to be brought back to Ireland and scattered (or buried) in my mother & father's grave - a beautiful old cemetery half way up a mountain, with the most naturally beautiful 'woodland' scenery surrounds. It's the area where I grew up and went to school and I know every inch of the countryside around this spot. Most of my friends' families are buried there also.
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by mac on 12th April 2018, 17:57

Candlelight wrote:Woodland burial is a nice notion, but it's not just a case of picking a spot wherever you wish.  You need to do your proper research first.  There are some fixed 'woodland burial' places around, but some of them are commercially owned areas and can end up costing a lot!
Here is a helpful site, detailing something of what is available around the UK:

http://woodlandburialtrust.com/content/woodland_burial_places.php

Some sites are large commercial enterprises, others are non-profit making charities or local authorities. You will find some sites that are not really woodlands at all, but rough areas added onto existing cemeteries, whilst others offer a much more natural setting. The important thing is that you are able to choose what is right for you and your family.

It is always a good idea to check if a site is registered with The Association of Natural Burial Grounds which is organised by a charity called the Natural Death Centre.

It is also important to ensure that any Woodland Site that you choose is properly certified, so ask to see their certificate.

(I worked for a number of years in the probate department of a legal firm - and saw quite a few requests/wishes for such - where unfortunately the trusted executors of the Will had since passed on themselves and it was left up to the appointed solicitor to see that those wishes were carried out appropriately.  Most were not actually legally binding and usually came under a 'Letter of Wishes' to accompany the Will - and as such a low-down priority when it came to dealing with distribution of the estate.

Everyone who knows me - knows that it is my wish to have my body cremated (doesn't really matter where - whichever is easiest and most convenient for those left behind), and for my ashes to be brought back to Ireland and scattered (or buried) in my mother & father's grave - a beautiful old cemetery half way up a mountain, with the most naturally beautiful 'woodland' scenery surrounds.  It's the area where I grew up and went to school and I know every inch of the countryside around this spot. Most of my friends' families are buried there also.
Scattering ashes seems easy enough  - I'd been thinking about burial which is legal on your own land but not on anyone else's without their permission.

My wishes are easy as I have no particular feeling for anywhere on this earth.  I don't care much - whatever is least trouble and trauma for whomever has to deal with my disposal.
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Misty
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Misty on 12th April 2018, 18:47

I didnt think it would be legal to be buried in your own garden. eek
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by mac on 12th April 2018, 19:03

Misty wrote:I didnt think it would be legal to be buried in your own garden.  eek
I hadn't realised until we watched a programme on BBC TV some time ago.  Although you can do it it might not be a bullet point when those who survive you are trying to sell your home!  lol
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Candlelight.kk
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Candlelight.kk on 12th April 2018, 19:21

It's perfectly legal, but you can encounter different obstacles, depending on where you live. Even the London boroughs differ from one to the next.

Some useful info here on Garden Burial: https://www.gardenlaw.co.uk/gardenburial.html

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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by mac on 12th April 2018, 19:32

Candlelight wrote:It's perfectly legal, but you can encounter different obstacles, depending on where you live.  Even the London boroughs differ from one to the next.

Some useful info here on Garden Burial:  https://www.gardenlaw.co.uk/gardenburial.html

That's a great and informative piece - not that I'm planning on following any of the guidance!  Wink   Oh the practicalities of the process that follows the event that precedes the situation that provides most of the discussion material here and elsewhere.
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Misty
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Misty on 12th April 2018, 20:14

I had to laugh at this bit..

If you are digging a grave yourself, you need to be careful and have help. If you are fit and enthusiastic, it should take about three hours work to dig a four foot deep grave. Try and shore up the first two feet of the grave so that it is supported when the mourners stand around it, and work steadily so that you don't strain yourself. You might want to take a bucket to stand on so that you can get out of the grave at the end of a tiring day!


gigle And make sure you dont kick the bucket before you've finished digging! thumb
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Candlelight.kk
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Candlelight.kk on 13th April 2018, 11:48

Misty wrote:I had to laugh at this bit..

If you are digging a grave yourself, you need to be careful and have help. If you are fit and enthusiastic, it should take about three hours work to dig a four foot deep grave. Try and shore up the first two feet of the grave so that it is supported when the mourners stand around it, and work steadily so that you don't strain yourself. You might want to take a bucket to stand on so that you can get out of the grave at the end of a tiring day!


gigle   And make sure you dont kick the bucket before you've finished digging!  thumb

laughing    I've often wondered where that phrase 'kick the bucket' comes from ...



This is the most likely association that I have found:

What's the origin of the phrase 'Kick the bucket'?

We all know what a bucket is - and so this phrase appears rather odd. Why should kicking one be associated with dying?
The link between buckets and death was made by at least 1785, when the phrase was defined in Grose’s Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue:
"To kick the bucket, to die."
 
One theory as to why, albeit with little evidence to support it, is that the phrase originates from the notion that people hanged themselves by standing on a bucket with a noose around their neck and then kicking the bucket away. There are no citations that relate the phrase to suicide and, in any case, why a bucket? Whenever I've needed something to stand on I can't recall ever opting for a bucket. This theory doesn't stand up any better than the supposed buckets did.

Useful advice if standing on a bucket - don't kick it.
The mist begins to clear with the fact that in 16th century England bucket had an additional meaning (and in some parts it still has), that is, a beam or yoke used to hang or carry items. The term may have been introduced into English from the French trébuchet - meaning a balance, or buque - meaning a yoke. That meaning of bucket was referred to in Peter Levins' Manipulus vocabulorum. A dictionarie of English and Latine wordes, 1570:
"A Bucket, beame, tollo."
and was used by Shakespeare in Henry IV Part II, 1597:
"Swifter then he that gibbets on the Brewers Bucket." [to gibbet meant to hang]
The wooden frame that was used to hang animals up by their feet for slaughter was called a bucket. Not unnaturally they were likely to struggle or to spasm after death and hence 'kick the bucket'.
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Misty
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Re: Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide

Post by Misty on 15th April 2018, 09:26

Candlelight wrote:Woodland burial is a nice notion, but it's not just a case of picking a spot wherever you wish.  You need to do your proper research first.  There are some fixed 'woodland burial' places around, but some of them are commercially owned areas and can end up costing a lot!
Here is a helpful site, detailing something of what is available around the UK:

http://woodlandburialtrust.com/content/woodland_burial_places.php


Thanks Candlelight. Very useful link.

    Current date/time is 11th December 2018, 14:39