Light After Life

Exploring the mysteries of Life, Death and Beyond. Afterlife, Mediumship, Spiritualism: Death is not the end; I am but waiting for you for an interval ...

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» To support or not
by Candlelight 17th April 2018, 09:56

» Medium - Allison Dubois
by Candlelight 17th April 2018, 09:39

» Arranging a funeral - A step-by-step guide
by Misty 15th April 2018, 09:26

» Charlie Kelly - Medium
by Misty 15th April 2018, 09:21

» Limited perspectives
by Candlelight 13th April 2018, 12:23

» We experience what we believe
by Candlelight 13th April 2018, 12:15

» In the dark with Gary Mannion (finally exposed as FRAUD)
by mac 12th April 2018, 19:38

» Celebrating the 170th Anniversary of Modern Spiritualism
by mac 12th April 2018, 19:37

» 5th Dimension: Near Death Experience (Science Documentary)
by Candlelight 10th April 2018, 13:33

» The Science of Near-Death Experiences
by Candlelight 10th April 2018, 12:22

» Open Week at the Arthur Findlay College, 2018
by Candlelight 7th April 2018, 12:29

» Spiritualists’ World Congress 2018 - AFC
by Candlelight 7th April 2018, 12:12

» Eben Alexander: A Neurosurgeon's Journey through the Afterlife
by Candlelight 31st March 2018, 17:25

» Michael Prescott's Blog
by Misty 30th March 2018, 13:52

» Spiritual Forums
by Misty 30th March 2018, 12:57

» The Way to The Light
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:42

» Temples of Wisdom
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:36

» The Search for Life after Death
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:29

» The Otherside Press
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:25

» Survival Research Institute of Canada
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:21

» Robert Lanza, M.D. - Biocentrism
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 13:06

» Multidimensional Man
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 12:21

» Life in the World Unseen
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 12:06

» Life Beyond Death
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 12:01

» International Foundation for Survival Research
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:57

» Forever Family Foundation
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:55

» There IS Life After Death
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:52

» Epoch Times: Studies Explore Life After Death
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:47

» Compelling Evidence for the Afterlife
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:45

» AllNurses: Death Bed Visions
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» Afterlife Forums
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:38

» Afterlife Research and Education Institute (AREI)
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» Afterlife Knowledge
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:11

» Afterlife 101
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 11:02

» Afterlife: A Guided Tour of Heaven And Its Wonders
by Candlelight 29th March 2018, 10:48

» Topics now listed alphabetically
by Candlelight 28th March 2018, 20:29

» International Spiritualist Federation (ISF)
by Candlelight 27th March 2018, 19:58

» Psychic News - April 2018 issue
by Candlelight 27th March 2018, 17:51

» Gordon Smith
by Stardust 27th March 2018, 11:44

» Nature and natural history books
by Stardust 27th March 2018, 11:35

» It's that time again ...
by mac 24th March 2018, 22:59

» Planet Earth
by Stardust 21st March 2018, 11:35

» Wildlife
by Stardust 21st March 2018, 08:48

» Friends
by Stardust 21st March 2018, 08:14

» The Day I Died (BBC Documentary)
by Candlelight 20th March 2018, 00:14

» First Spiritual Temple
by Misty 17th March 2018, 22:21

» Campaign for Philosophical Freedom
by Candlelight 13th March 2018, 20:08

» Afterlife Research Centre (ARC)
by Candlelight 13th March 2018, 19:58

» Association Trans Communication (ATC)
by Candlelight 13th March 2018, 19:41

» Making a difference
by Candlelight 12th March 2018, 12:26

» Pioneer Journal
by Candlelight 10th March 2018, 18:08

» Science and the Scéance (BBC Documentary)
by Candlelight 10th March 2018, 16:35

» Sally Morgan
by mac 9th March 2018, 21:29

» Growing ourselves
by Candlelight 5th March 2018, 15:15

» Mediumship, Psychical Research & Leslie Flint 1998
by Candlelight 2nd March 2018, 15:17

» Psychic News - March 2018 issue
by Candlelight 27th February 2018, 17:23

» International Association for the Preservation of Spiritual and Occult Periodicals (IAPSOP)
by mac 26th February 2018, 23:14

» [solved] Yahoo Mail down - again!
by Misty 26th February 2018, 11:51

» The Case of ESP - (Original, Uncut 1983 BBC Film)
by Candlelight 23rd February 2018, 19:57

» Psychic (Part 1 and 2)
by Candlelight 20th February 2018, 15:56

» Harry Edwards And His Healing
by Candlelight 19th February 2018, 20:16

» A reminder ....
by Candlelight 19th February 2018, 14:02

» Feeling safe
by Candlelight 14th February 2018, 13:52

» The Enfield Haunting
by Candlelight 7th February 2018, 20:46

» Time to stop seeking?
by Candlelight 6th February 2018, 23:04

» Security
by Candlelight 6th February 2018, 12:55

» Psychic News
by evergreen 4th February 2018, 17:59

» [solved] Just to reassure ....
by Candlelight 30th January 2018, 14:21

» What is Your Psychological Archetype? - Quiz
by Misty 29th January 2018, 12:51

» Opportunity
by Candlelight 29th January 2018, 10:05

» Defending Joel Waller
by mac 26th January 2018, 13:58

» Psychic News - February 2018
by Candlelight 25th January 2018, 15:39

» What is soul consciousness?
by Candlelight 23rd January 2018, 10:14

» Kai Muegge
by mac 20th January 2018, 14:06

» What The Bleep Do We Know? - Down The Rabbit Hole
by Candlelight 15th January 2018, 18:34

» Silver Birch
by mac 12th January 2018, 00:34

» Commitments to serve
by Candlelight 10th January 2018, 11:29

» Merry Christmas!
by CandyJohn 5th January 2018, 05:39

» HAPPY NEW YEAR !
by CandyJohn 5th January 2018, 05:38

» Transformation
by Candlelight 4th January 2018, 20:57

» Warren Caylor
by Misty 3rd January 2018, 14:34

» Quote of the Day
by mac 31st December 2017, 18:40

» Psychic News - January 2018
by ariel 28th December 2017, 23:12

» Reality and the Extended Mind (Documentary)
by Candlelight 28th December 2017, 10:27

» Hi to all
by Candlelight 27th December 2017, 14:23

» Hello !
by Candlelight 27th December 2017, 14:19

» Who is Waller Joel?
by Candlelight 27th December 2017, 13:17

» Hello
by CandyJohn 27th December 2017, 04:38

» Remember...
by Candlelight 26th December 2017, 16:05

» How does Mediumship work?
by Candlelight 23rd December 2017, 20:01

» Grimms' Fairy Tales
by mac 22nd December 2017, 14:19

» Are you ready to re-align with the changing seasons?
by Candlelight 21st December 2017, 12:45

» hi all
by CandyJohn 21st December 2017, 05:56

» Hello Everyone
by CandyJohn 21st December 2017, 05:54

» CandyJohn is here?
by CandyJohn 21st December 2017, 05:52

» illusion?
by Candlelight 21st December 2017, 02:01

» Renesme is here
by Misty 18th December 2017, 13:07

» Tony Stockwell
by Misty 18th December 2017, 12:45

» Water wisdom
by Candlelight 17th December 2017, 11:46

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People are different

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Candlelight
.
.

Posts : 2298
Location : London

People are different

Post by Candlelight on 19th May 2017, 19:54

21 Jul 2015, 20:20
.


"...conflict is the primary engine of creativity and innovation.
People don't learn by staring into a mirror; people learn by encountering difference."
-- Ronald Heifetz



In his book, 'Men, Women and Relationships,' John Gray says, "People are different. Recognizing this fundamental truth is essential for creating positive and loving relationships. In practice, however, ... we demand that the people in our lives feel, think, and behave as we would. And when they react differently we make them wrong or invalidate them; we try to fix them when they really need understanding and nurturing; we try to improve them when instead they need acceptance, appreciation and trust."

We each bring different gifts to this world. We each have different work to do. Our lives are enriched when we can celebrate these differences rather than resent, resist and reject them. As we get more secure in who we are, we get more compassionate toward others.



"Homogeneity makes for healthy milk but anemic friendships.
We need relationships that cross culturally imposed lines to enlarge our hearts and expand our vistas."
-- Dan Schmidt
avatar
Stardust
Gold Star Member
Gold Star Member

Posts : 903
Location : City of Light

Re: People are different

Post by Stardust on 19th May 2017, 19:59

29 Jul 2015, 21:44

Candlelight.kk wrote:
John Gray says, "... we demand that the people in our lives feel, think, and behave as we would. And when they react differently we make them wrong or invalidate them; we try to fix them when they really need understanding and nurturing; we try to improve them when instead they need acceptance, appreciation and trust."

We don't do this at all, do we? Not in my experience.

Opposites attract, so "Vive la différence!".



A gentle whisper like the breeze sighing, so easy to miss, listen carefully...
avatar
Candlelight
.
.

Posts : 2298
Location : London

Re: People are different

Post by Candlelight on 19th May 2017, 20:36

03 Aug 2015, 18:36

Stardust wrote:
Candlelight.kk wrote:
John Gray says, "... we demand that the people in our lives feel, think, and behave as we would. And when they react differently we make them wrong or invalidate them; we try to fix them when they really need understanding and nurturing; we try to improve them when instead they need acceptance, appreciation and trust."

We don't do this at all, do we? Not in my experience.

Nor in my experience either, Stardust  very happy - but can you really expect any different from the author of 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus'.

I think the above quote comes direct from another of his books 'Men, Women and Relationships: Making Peace with the Opposite Sex'.

Here's a review of that book (which just says it all):

Men and women are alien species, writes relationship guru Gray in this 1993 forerunner to his bestselling Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus series, now in paperback. Women are emotional, subjective, relationship-oriented and like to talk about feelings, while men are rational, objective, work-oriented and like to withdraw into their "cave" and watch TV. The mutual incomprehension of the sexes leads to friction and conflicted relationships in which women feel neglected and unloved and men feel nagged and smothered. Rather than denying or suppressing their differences, Gray argues, men and women must acknowledge their masculine and feminine essences and learn to understand, tolerate and value the characteristics of the opposite sex. Men must learn to listen sympathetically ("make reassuring responses like 'hmm,' 'uh-huh,' or 'tell me more,'") while women must learn to give men space. Gray often pushes the essentialism too far ("Illness and disease are manifestations of the dark side of our female self") and treads lightly around issues of sexism. But many readers will see elements of truth in these behavioral stereotypes, and Gray has a perfect pitch for the ways in which misunderstandings can escalate into shouting matches and deep-seated marital bitterness. His is a hopeful message that troubled relationships stem from a simple failure to communicate, but it skirts the possibility that there might be deeper sources of conflict between men and women.
(Nov.) Copyright 2003 Cahners Business Information.


Stardust wrote:
Opposites attract, so "Vive la différence!".

Absolutely!  very happy

    Current date/time is 20th April 2018, 10:04